How does the central Maven repository really get populated?

I heard the story second hand, but thought it was worth repeating.

At last the secret has been revealed – that the Maven repository upload process is much like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Carlos has a team of Oompa Loompas that carry the JARs back and forth until they reach their final destination.

They even have those scales where a POM can be weighed to determine if it is “Bad”, “Very Bad”, or “commons-logging 1.1”.

So, the next time you are at Contegix, don’t be surprised to hear small chants echoing through the cages…

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-do
I have a maven upload for you
Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-dee
resolved won’t fix, bad group ID

What do you get when your license is wrong?
Your request is denied before too long
What if you request someone else’s project?
What will be the answer, to, that?

You’re not a developer…

Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-da
File it correctly, and up goes your jar
You’ll have all your dependencies too
Like the Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do